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Top Five

... items on Elvis' to-do list


1. Eat a hunka hunka chedder cheese.

2. Somehow try to get it through my fans' heads that I'm fucking dead.

3. Thank the fans. Thank them very much.

4. Roll in grave. Repeat as necessary.

5. Rattle some chains and make some groaning noises over at Michael Jackson's ranch.

Says who?

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