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Seven days to live


24 Thursday


Comedian Gabriel Rutledge is a real looker, and he knows it. "For a guy, I'm a five. For a lesbian, a solid nine," he's joked at past gigs. And as far as fitness, Rutledge says there's nothing better for a couple than to be out of shape. "Eventually you just get to the point where it's like, 'Well, honey, looks like we've eaten ourselves into a monogamous relationship.'" So if you want some of that, and you're 21 or older, hit Loonees Comedy Corner (1305 N. Academy Blvd., at 8 tonight, or Friday and Saturday at either 8 or 10:30. Tickets are $2 to $9, with a two-item minimum. — Bryce Crawford


25 Friday


Before you freak out about Indy sales exec David Jeffrey playing in the band Grass It Up, which I'm promoting right here, remember that it was readers, like you, who voted for said bluegrass outfit as 2010's Best Original Band. And before suggesting we might have rigged the vote, hear this: I certainly don't get paid enough to do the extra work. Oh yeah, and it's wrong. It would also be wrong to ignore Grass' live recording sessions today and tomorrow at Western Jubilee Recording Co. (433 E. Cucharras St., Tickets (which must be purchased in advance) for the 7:30 shows are $10 to $30 and include special guest performances by the Neck Slappers and the ability to say later, "I was there." — Edie Adelstein


26 Saturday


In Lakotah Sioux tradition, a heyokah is a special shaman who possesses, among other talents, an ability to control thunderstorms (way cool). A heyokah also plays a sort of clown, mirroring people so they can see their ailments, then heal by laughing at themselves. Makes more sense than our current health care system, huh? Tonight is the penultimate chance to catch The Heyokah Project, the Manitou Art Theatre's (1367 Pecan St., original collaboration with visiting performer Bill Bowers. Playing off the Lakotah legend, local actors share their true stories of laughing through struggle. Tonight's show is at 8, and tomorrow's is at 2; seats are $20. — Matthew Schniper


Safe: Tantamount to your helmet, your seatbelt and the Cheerios that keep your cholesterol down. Sex: Synonymous with beds, pleasure and Jersey Shore. Taken together ... a little tedious and dull, right? SKIRT, a women's music and "safer sex" festival hosted by Colorado College, is here to tell you otherwise. Born of frustration with traditional avenues of sex education, SKIRT — "sex, knowledge, involve, rhythm, transform" — will offer free workshops, music and food from 2 to 10 p.m. today. Planned Parenthood kicks off the day's demos, and is followed by a student-led masturbation workshop. Also included: a session of ecstatic dance, and a burlesque show. Stay for a performance by five local bands, either all-female or led by the fairer sex, ranging from indie to groove-rock to bluegrass. The queen-bee headliner here is CC alum Abigail Washburn, a world-renowned banjo player, indie vocalist and all-around badass. The festivities will be held on campus at Armstrong Hall (14 E. Cache la Poudre St.,, and though everything is free, tickets are required to see Washburn. — Claire Jencks


27 Sunday


There aren't any women on the list of performers for tonight's Rock & Worship Roadshow at the World Arena (3185 Venetucci Blvd.,, but there is plenty of hair product. Christian rockers MercyMe, Jars of Clay, Thousand Foot Krutch, Matt Maher, the Afters, Lecrae and Anthem Lights almost all sport some fancy man-do's with their powerful lungs. If you like (or don't mind) a bit of praise with your pop, this 7 p.m. event's a smokin' deal for just ten bucks (available only at the door). — Kirsten Akens


28 Monday


Each day this Black History Month, KCME-FM (88.7, has featured the biography and music of a classical musician with African ancestry. The Sounds and Songs of Black History can be heard at 9 a.m., 2 p.m. and 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; 8 a.m., 10 and 4 p.m., Saturday; and 8 a.m., 1 and 4 p.m. Sunday. The top of the hour brings a bio written and narrated — in-house — by Michael Campion and Jana Lee Ross, followed by approximately 20 minutes of the music. Those who strike out in all three chances (and don't swing) to catch today's program on Duke Ellington have my symphony. — Eric Calder


1 Tuesday


If you've ever wondered why artists don't press their singles onto chocolate, just ask Innerpartysystem. The Pennsylvania electro-industrial band, which resides within radioactive dust-cloud distance of Three Mile Island, sent a confectionery copy of their single "Don't Stop" to the office of metal mag Kerrang!, which upon playing it, famously reported, "There's SOMETHING there." In higher-fidelity formats, the band sounds like a less angst-ridden Nine Inch Nails with a bit more of a dance feel. It's at the Black Sheep (2106 E. Platte Ave.,, 8 p.m., $10/adv, $12/door, all ages. — Bill Forman


2 Wednesday


Meghan McCain's childhood idea of a tea party might have looked like a few stuffed animals seated in lawn chairs, around a kid-size table. That childhood concept was crushed when a bunch of angry old white people started gathering to protest, mostly seated in lawn chairs. McCain has criticized Tea Partiers in her recent book Dirty Sexy Politics and you can count on hearing more of her thoughts when she shares them at 7 tonight for a free presentation, "Redefining Republican: No Labels. No Boxes. No Stereotypes," at CSU-Pueblo's Hoag Recital Hall (2200 Bonforte Blvd., Pueblo, Matt Ruppert

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