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Nightmare Cookies delivers a patchwork of competing highs


The presence of Blue Dream influences Nightmare Cookies, for good or ill. - BRANDON SODERBERG
  • Brandon Soderberg
  • The presence of Blue Dream influences Nightmare Cookies, for good or ill.

Weed hybrids work best when their strains are in harmony or when there’s tension between them. Discord doesn’t really work out for weed, though the vast and convoluted world of almost-inbred hybrids offers plenty of discordant strains — with harried highs that can be like putting the Photoshop Smudge filter on real life and are often seen as “peak couch-lock mannnnnnn” — that would potentially prove me wrong here. Who am I to judge really — weed is medicine and people need different medicines — but yeah, I am suspicious of these “Jungle Juice”-like strains (Phantom OG is a recently reviewed culprit).

A combination of White Nightmare (which combines the precocious White Moonshine with Blue Dream) and Girl Scout Cookies (OG Kush and Durban Poison, and really good for edibles so it is a bit too strong or unwieldy and best taken in small bites), Nightmare Cookies is regulated by the presence of steady, stalwart fave, Blue Dream. It referees the strains a little when they get too unwieldy and if you focus, you can feel Nightmare Cookies’ Indica and Sativa qualities fighting it out, pushing and pulling at one another, directing the high to go in two different directions. Usually, the Sativa side is the victor. Extremely stoned, extremely alert, and not paranoid is a hard balance for a strain to strike, and Nightmare Cookies gets there. Residual menacing or residual pleasing feelings continue to come at each other here, and you sometimes feel like you’re dipped in tar, stuck sitting there feeling the weight of everything press upon you, dripping so slowly all over you it’s almost in reverse, and other times, covered in marshmallow, a gloopy, goofy monster, immobile, sweet. That is still pretty overwhelming.

If this works for you, thank Blue Dream and if it’s a whole mess, blame Blue Dream. There are times when Nightmare Cookies is calming, though still off, like someone clapping on the one and the three, just doing an easy thing wrong. Again, Nightmare Cookies can go either way. Its smell and taste are similarly conflicted. Sriracha Lysol maybe. A touch spicy, peppery, with a dash of an artificial lemon veering on ammonia on the back end (this is what some smokers more generously describe as a “cookie dough” flavor, I think). Something in the words in its name — nightmare and cookies — has tension almost. It is a binary that doesn’t quite line up: scary vs. delicious — or something? I thought of this line by Alfredo Bonanno in The Anarchist Tension: “Anarchism is a tension, not a realization.” Bonanno says it in response to those who call anarchists “dreamers.” For weed or rather why I thought of this is because it is about wanting one thing or one specific thing — namely, a result — and Nightmare Cookies denies you that, providing a complex patchwork of competing highs instead.

Strength: 8
Nose: Sriracha Lysol
Euphoria: 10
Existential dread: 1
Freaking out when a crazy person approaches you: 3
Drink pairing: Green tea
Music pairing: Oneohtrix Point Never’s Garden of Delete or Henry Kaiser’s It’s a Wonderful Life
Rating: 7

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