The FDA had no idea what sort of hell it would unleash by declaring a war of aggression against Phusion Projects' fruity-flavored blackouts in a can. Tremble before the next generation of tea partiers!
From email@example.com's press release:
The banning of Four Loko malt liquor by the FDA has spawned a grassroots political revolution unseen in this country since 1776. Much like the Tea Party Movement, the Free Loko Movement (www.freeloko.com) documents the civil unrest and ongoing political grandstanding that is attempting to wrest the alcoholic energy drink, Four Loko, from the hands of responsible Americans.
In one of its ongoing campaigns, the Free Loko Movement has encouraged to petition President Obama to rethink his unfair and socially damaging domestic Four Loko policies: http://www.freeloko.com/four-loko/send-a-letter-to-the-president/
FreeLoko.com is designed to give readers a perspective not warped and whitewashed by such organizations as the Liberal Media, The Obama Administration, the Illuminati, The Walt Disney Corporation, or the World AIDS Police. The Free Loko Movement is an activist organization dedicated to raising awareness of one of the greatest injustices of our time: the infantilization of the American as a result of FDA and Congressional paternalism.
Soon our youth will be forced to return to the dark days of mixing Red Bull with vodka and grape juice, just to get wasted. TSA Nazis, the Quantitative easing, and now this — will this assault on 'Merica never end?