I loved Zombieland. But I must admit, as funny as it was, the movie still gave me nightmares. So when I opened my e-mail this morning and learned of Brent Bingham's Zombie Survival 101 class, coming to the Bijou Bar at 6 p.m. this Thursday, I checked my calendar.
According to the website, by attending this $15 2-hour workshop, you will:
*Increase your chances of surviving the impending necropoliptic threat
*Practice basic self defense skills and Zombie destruction
*Learn to identify different Zombie types
*Discover methods of dealing with physical encounters of the Zombie kind as well as third party rescue and defense
*Participate in the Human vs. Zombie war for survival
Of course, Bingham, a Master black belt and martial arts instructor with Agoge Integrated Martial Arts Academy in Denver, admits on the site he's never witnessed an actual Zombie, but he had to "be creative to get his foot in the door." As he says, "If you can calmly deal with the flesh-eaters threat, you can survive anything!"
And if Zombies really aren't your thing, perhaps Bingham's Jedi Academy will turn your fancy. You gotta give the guy points for creatively selling the business.