Comic genius coming to Pueblo

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While scanning Pollstar's concert listings for the Colorado Springs area this morning, our attention was drawn to a brand new entry. Mark your calendars now: August 20. Pueblo Convention Center. Gallagher.

Yes, America’s most beloved comic genius — the man who taught a generation that smashing watermelons with a sledge hammer is the funniest thing ever — is coming to our humble Front Range.

To understand just how profound Gallagher’s effect on the American psyche has been, we sought the opinion of a recognized expert in the field.

“Without Leo Anthony Gallagher, there would be no ‘Will It Blend?'’” says professor Frederick Douglass Opie, who chairs the psychology department at UC-Guantanamo and wrote the New York Times bestseller, Gallagher and Carrot Top, WTF? “There would also be no Liam and Noel Gallagher, which means, of course, that there would be no Oasis.

"Other than Carrot Top," concludes Opie, "I can think of no individual more responsible for making our culture what it is today.”

We also visited Gallagher’s official website just to see what hilarity he’s cooking up for this new tour. On his home page, we found new examples of the comedian's up-to-the-minute topical humor, beginning with hilarious jokes about Hillary Clinton’s current Presidential bid.

So as not to risk typos or miss nuances, we’ve faithfully cut-and-pasted one below. Enjoy!

A President Hillary would confuse state dinners too. After a meal, couples like to walk and talk. Usually the men talk and the women talk. But Hillary would need to talk to the man with power. That leaves Bill to talk to the wife and that's not smart for anybody.

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